Good (late) evening Coaches. Another Thursday and anyone bothering to keep track will note that these are getting later in the day, still hours before KO tonight though – thank god for time zones! In all seriousness, does anyone really read the intros anyway? Let me know in the comment section, if there is one. Again, who’s keeping track. Anyway, you’re all here to see how your team is doing, hopefully it’s better than Wales. Read on.
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12. Patistan (1-3) Non-mover
A well deserved win for Coach Allen. An the fact it came with the help of key waiver pickups Fitzmagic and Jefferson makes it sweeter still. Mixon came up big, and I doubt he can be relied on for many more performances of that magnitude, Patistan still need Thomas back, then they can start to build on this (and get off the bottom of this list).
11. Tom’s Tyrants (0-4) Non-mover
A good performance but not the right result, justly feeling a little hard done by. A more well rounded performance in general, with Robinson, Gibson and Gurley all growing into bigger and better roles. Unfortunately, growing time isn’t just running out, it has run out. Have to win this week.
10. The Tuckfards (2-2) Down 1
This was the week I kept talking about when I wasn’t bumping them up the rankings. A lack of targets and touches, plus Mahomes being just your above average starting NFL QB, rather than his usual tone-setting self. They need to find some of the infamous diamonds in the rough they have made a career off.
9. Gridiron Gang (1-2) Down 1
Not quite managing to build on the previous week’s result, but even worse was the loss of Ekeler. In a season that many teams have had defined by injury, Coach Stubbs Jr. is now down his top two draft picks. Golladay did pick up where he left off in 2019, which is a silver lining.
8. Forge Flyers (2-2) Up 2
Well, fair play. Despite streaming about half a team, they got the win, and even more impressively hit the 100 point mark. DJ Chark looks like he is going to continue to be a key contributor with matchup winning potential. If Lamar Jackson can start doing some more of the 2019 stuff he did last week, he could make this team really dangerous.
7. U R Gould (3-1) Non-mover
Big scorers? Nah. Putting together an impressive record? Sure thing. They are only joint (yes really, joint) 8th for scoring in the league, but they have also conceded the least by a margin. Losing Chubb for a few weeks is definitely going to hurt them, he’s been their best player until now. The challenge is on to keep the wins rolling in.
6. Buccing the Trend (2-2) Down 1
They have certainly cooled off a little since the first couple of games. DK Metcalf and Tyreek Hill are gamebreakers with superstar QBs, but they are going to have less impressive weeks, Coach Taylor won’t want to find himself relying on them. Josh Jacobs has had a couple of down weeks in tough matchups, they’ll be looking for another player with his kind of touches.
5. Burdettinators (1-3) Down 1
To be clear from the off, they aren’t dropping for the performance, but the record is starting to hurt them. Ridley pulled an absolute dud, out of nowhere, and it really cost them in the tight matchup, despite some OBJ magic. Coach Burdett will be rightly annoyed, but he should keep his eyes on the season ahead.
4. IKSAN (3-1) Up 2
On the right side of the game of the week, dragged over the line by Carson despite the multiple injuries he is apparently carrying. Being 3-1 is great, but they will be even happier given the fact Mostert is close to a return and McCaffrey isn’t due to be too far behind. Concerning for us other Coaches.
3. Bear Necessities (2-2) Non-mover
A very good week and bad luck not to get the win. Led by Josh Allen and the stable of RBs, they have a solid platform for weekly points. Coach Stubbs Sr. will be hoping to build on the win column in the coming weeks, he has assembled a group of players that deserves to be operating above a .500 record.
2. Odell or Nodell (3-1) Non-mover
Oh, they’re good. Another monster week. Literally everyone turned up and then Murray put 20 on the bench just for good measure. I had them pretty high up the rankings after the draft, a decision I seem to remember wasn’t agreed with on other LOC media channels, but I guarantee no one wants to play them right now.
1. The Dream Team (4-0) Non-mover
Not at their very best, but still got the win and got over the 100 point mark. The good news is that Kittle looked dominant in his return to the lineup and the cream on the cake is that Kareem Hunt just became the lead back in Cleveland. They may not be the high scorers, but they continue to be the team to beat.
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Unless someone starts letting my team win, these outros aren’t going to get any longer. Ultimatum time. I’m desperate in case it doesn’t show. Until next week.
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