2017: Power Rankings Week 9

Week 9, here we come, and with 6 games to go it is still all to play for. One team has nearly locked up the division, others are still jostling, some are on their last legs, and a couple are realistically out of the running. These next few weeks, while not defining, will certainly go a long way to securing, or missing out on, playoffs.

Power Rankings

1. Forge Flyers, 7-1 (1): Even in a week where this team was missing 6, count them SIX, players to byes, they still won. No, it wasn't a pretty performance, you'd struggle to do that being down so many players. But the fact coach Leach's side still put up an ok score and brought home the win makes you think this could be a team of destiny. With a 3 game lead and only 6 to go, they've nearly locked up a trip to the dance.

2. Burdettinators, 4-4 (2): Another dirty win, but they all count, and Coach Burdett deserves a few of them considering how the season started for them. Still, the dodgy last few weeks are a bit of an eye raiser. They have the players on the bench, so ultimately you'd expect them to consistently score well, but it's something we're going to have to keep an eye on.

3. Tanky McTankface, 3-5 (7): Coach Merritt moves up to the high spots again, but they still lost last week, and they're running out of chances. At 3-5, I think the team is great. They're finally delivering what we've seen on paper since the draft. However, they're currently 2 games behind the division and the wildcard spot. While not insurmountable, with many competitive teams still above them, they might need a lot to go there way to make the playoffs.

4. ADRZ, 5-3 (9): Boomshakala. That's all I have to say really. But ADRZ's score this week was not only their season best, but a league wide season best. It all fell right for them. And while I think they're a good consistent side, everything fell right for them last week and I'm not sure this is sustainable. But when they're not scoring 155 points, they're still pretty good and have a good chance at playoffs.

5. Patistan, 4-4 (3): Last week was a major down week for Coach Allen, one that has been really out of kilter of their season so far. I expect them to bounce back though, they've got too many good players to be scoring like that each week. Patistan on paper look like a team who should be scoring buckets of points each week, I think they'll get it together.

6. IKSAN, 5-3 (4): This team has changed narratives about 4 times already this season, and here's another: the last 3 weeks IKSAN have been goooood. I was going to put this team at 3 this week because I think they're hear to say...until I woke up to seeing Elliott has been suspended again. While they're certainly more than just Elliott, there's no doubt he's been a pillar of this team, and it takes them down a notch.

7. Gridiron Gang, 5-3 (5): Gridiron Gang have had a lackluster last couple of weeks due to a QB injury and some poor play. That will probably continue into next week with 4 players on a bye and another still out injured. Despite that, Coach Stubbs Jr. has managed to cobble a competitive side together and they remain firmly in the hunt for a playoff spot.

8. The Dream Team, 3-5 (6): It's gone a bit under the radar, but Coach Nathwani has lost his last 4 games now, only topping 90 points in one of them. It's definitely a concern, and a problem we foresaw when Beckham went down. I don't want to say they're out of it as they still have 3 wins at this stage and an ok team, but I just don't think the team has the firepower required to make a comeback at this stage. I think they'll finish well but ultimately just miss out.

9. Bear Necessities, 4-4 (8): So unfortunately, as we all expected, Aaron Rodgers was the straw that broke the camels back for this team. While Big Ben has filled in admirably in his absence, this team needs a great QB to support the rest of the roster. They had a lot of byes this week which didn't help, so they're not quite flat lining, but the prognosis is about 50/50 at this point.

10. Tom's Tyrants, 2-6 (10): Just after we thought Coach Barnes was triggering come back mode...the power got cut in the building. A dismal day, in which the light at the end of the tunnel may have dimmed for this team. 3 games behind in the division and in the wildcard race, I don't think team has the potential to overcome it. They will probably have some good weeks, but I think it's time to hand the fork to Coach Barnes. Stick a fork in 'em, THEY DONE.

11. Cash4Gould, 5-3 (12): Another week, another sub 90 point outing for Coach Gardner. In other news, another win. Go figure. QB has been a problem child for this team so far this season, but inconsistency has been the problem child's big brother. They have some nice shiny players that just aren't delivering the mail, and the supporting cast hasn't picked up the slack so far. Still, at 5-3, they're in a good spot to get hot and roll to the finish.

12. The Southampton Narwhals, 1-7 (11): Coach Nunn's only goal at this point is to win as many games as possible, and avoid having the losingest season of all time (which I believe is either 2-12 or 3-11). They're certainly not hapless. Last week was a bad week, but they've done a really good job of getting a decent amount of points each week. They need an infusion from somewhere to help them though.

EDOTLOCCA's Corner: Week 8

Hello everyone and welcome to Week 8 with yours truly, it’s another EDOTLOCCA’s Corner. So we find ourselves halfway through the LOC regular season. Some of us already starting to plan for the playoffs, some of us holding on to post season dreams and some of us looking forward to the 2018 draft where greener pastures (and hopefully no bikinis) might await. We are also fully into bye week season and some coaches have been hit hilariously hard (more on that later), so Week 8 promises to throw a few curveballs. But, before we get ahead of ourselves, the Week 7 awards.

Coaches Award

Bye weeks are quite often what separates the pretenders from the contenders. Teams with great depth or coaches adept on the waivers will always take a couple of steps forward at this point in the season. With both starting receivers out on consecutive bye weeks, rookie WR JuJu Smith-Schuster was grabbed off of waivers and proved critical in a tight win in Week 7. But what makes it more impressive? Coach Wells doesn’t even have any waiver credits for bargaining. Credit for the smart pick up and well merited win.

Honourable mention: He has had him rostered all season, but Coach Merritt has now turned to the red hot Wentz. The win was already in the bag this week, but this could be a turning point in the season.

Wooden Spoon

This one feels harsh all things considered and I would like to be the first to say that I think coming within two yards of 100 fantasy points when your roster has just been flipped upside-down is quite impressive. However, I play by strict rules here. Coach Stubbs Sr. lost a tight game when he had enough points left on the bench for the win, hard luck.

Bold Predictions

Nil-pwa. My early season hot streak has been seriously rained on. Like monsoon-ed or typhoon-ed or something else geographical. We are on a 3 week dry spell (hang on, is that contradictory?) for correct predictions. But, now it is time to get out the metaphorical brolly/parasol! – Depending on which analogy you are keeping up with.

The Southampton Narwhals vs. Forge Flyers: Wow, in biblical terms, David just swapped his slingshot for a trebuchet. Or more to the point, Goliath just had one of his legs chopped off. The byes have given The Narwhals a chance and I reckon they pull it off with their first 100 point performance of the year.

The Dream Team vs. Burdettinators: Interesting matchup in Reed vs. Ertz here. I was (half) right last week with Reed finding his feet, but Ertz has been the TE#1 so far this season. 35 points between them could be achievable.

Gridiron Gang vs. Patistan: Going to go a little bit off of the beaten track here and say that, looking at the skillsets of the starters, we will see over 200 receiving yards here… by running backs.

Cash4Gould vs. Bear Necessities: A second case of a mega bye week has been made slightly less severe by the Rodgers injury. I see this being the closest game of the week. It will be decided Monday night, by less than 3 points.

ADRZ vs. Tanky McTankface: After already talking up Wentz, I also see a big day for Wilson here with the Seahawks finally clicking and playing a high scoring Texans team. 70 combined fantasy points is not out of the question.

Tom’s Tyrants vs. IKSAN: After Murray showing up bigtime on Coach Sherwood’s bench last week, he could be in for a similar performance in London. Leaving him on the bench could be cause for a Wooden Spoon award in Week 9.

And, as if by magic, we are done. With possibly my earliest post of the season (it is amazing how much of a kiss up the ass evening plans are), I will bid you all fair well. Enjoy the rest of your evening and good luck in the games. Until next time.

2017 Power Rankings: Week 8

As we officially cross the line into the second half of the season, crunch time has begun. This is where the race really starts to heat up, and while it's still way too early to seal someone up or lay someone to rest, there's no doubt any bad weeks from here on out can cost you.

Power Rankings

1. Forge Flyers, 6-1 (1): This team really is on a hot streak, and barring an injury I really can't see it slowing down. This side is probably better than Coach Leach's 2011 season (which to me says he's on for a career year). Now 3 games ahead in the division, you never want to say it's over, but it would take a real late season collapse for them not to win the division.

2. Burdettinators, 3-4 (2): It was an alright week for Coach Burdett, certainly not as good as some he has had, however this week the luck broke for him and he got the win despite that. Still a good team, they were bailed out massively by a couple of performances, but with a couple of injuries and bye weeks they weren't at full strength. Whether the luck keeps going there way or not will be interesting to see.

3. Patistan, 4-3 (4): This one is going to sting. Coach Allan was facing a 1-5 team that dropped 137 points out of nowhere on them. Still, Patistan scored 119 which is nothing to be ashamed of, and in a close division the points can make all the difference. Look for them to keep competing at a high level as the season goes on.

4. IKSAN, 4-3 (8): This team is slightly all over the place with their scoring, but last week was firmly an up and they've got two wins in a row now. In what is a relatively soft division (though has seemingly become a lot stronger in the space of a week) they should be able to continue with the good turnouts. I think at this point the only thing standing in IKSAN's way is IKSAN themselves.

5. Gridiron Gang, 4-3 (5): And thus ends the 4 game winning streak of Gridiron Gang. But the fact this team strung 4 wins together at all with all the injuries suffered is an accomplishment alone, and they were overdue a loss. Considering this loss was largely down to an injury at QB, and that was the only thing preventing last week from being a decent week, they should bounce back promptly.

6. The Dream Team, 3-4 (3): I really can't make out this Dream Team side. One week they're down and I think they're done, the other week they're up and I think they're all good. In reality, they're probably just an inconsistent team. With relatively few options to turn to on the bench, and a seemingly more volatile starting lineup, they'll certainly have their weeks, but there will also be some bad weeks too.

7. Tanky McTankface, 3-4 (10): Are Tanky McTankface back? Is what looks good on paper finally starting to look good in reality also? It might just well be. And turning over the reigns to Carson Wentz is quite frankly overdue, and it's a big reason for their reversal of fortunes. Amazingly only 1 game behind in the division, Coach Merritt may make a return to the playoffs yet.

8. Bear Necessities, 4-3 (6): It was a decent week in the post Aaron Rodgers era of Bear Necessities, but I think they'll be hard pressed to make it stay. Big Ben did have a decent week, but around that it feels dicey. And when you're starting 2 RBs on the same team, you know you're in a bit of hot water. Still, at 4-3, they only need a few wins to fall their way and they could still make it to the dance.

9. ADRZ, 4-3 (7): A week after losing their consistent status, they returned to the golden 90 points, but unfortunately I don't think it's going to stay. They will absolutely have good weeks, but a few players really over compensated for what was a rough week. While they absolutely are still alive in the division and the playoff race, I just have a feeling as the season go on this team will fall behind ever so slightly.

10. Tom's Tyrants, 2-5 (11): Here it is people, the Coach Barnes revival we've all been waiting for. Watch out, they'll come back and win every game and the title now. Oh right, yeah, I'm not Chris... But joking aside, this was a great week where nearly everything fell right, and I actually can see this team build off of this. Don't expect a good week every week, but they're certainly not done.

11. The Southampton Narwhals, 1-6 (12): It's quite incredible Coach Nunn's ability to turn out around 90 points each week given the injuries and the state of the roster. He has lost a number of games that could have easily gone the other way. If they even had some waiver players this season could be entirely different, but alas they are 1-6 and just looking to spoil the party for other teams now.

12. Cash4Gould, 4-3 (9): Winning cures what ails you right? It's just as well Coach Gardner has 4 wins, because this has masked what has been a really troubling season so far. They've topped 90 points just once so far. And with the current state of affairs...I'm afraid to say that's probably going to be the norm. They will have good weeks, they've got talent, but consistency is the elusive part of the equation.

EDOTLOCCA's Corner: Week 7

Good evening gents. Welcome to the latest (no pun intended but this is late in the day) edition of EDOTLOCCA’s Corner. Voted by the masses as a top three piece of LOC media, I’m as impressed as you guys that it is Week 7 and I haven’t (majorly) slipped up yet. Maybe focussing too much loyalty to the article is costing the Tyrants, maybe not, either way you should all be grateful for both having something to read on a Thursday night and an easy win at the weekend! Anyway, time for the show people, enjoy.

Coaches Award

Looking for the thing that tips a tilt each week is tricky, but with all the great minds of the LOC we can always rely on the odd piece of genius. This Coach may have been getting a bit of a hard time of late, but the best way to turn that around is to prove me wrong and pick up the W. They scavenged other teams’ sidecast players and made them starters and stars. Came Newton was critical to Week 6’s victory and it put his (new) team back in the running for the division crown. Congrats to Coach Gardner.

Wooden Spoon

Well, we were all concerned when the plan was formulated draft day. No one could claim they saw this coming, but we all understand the consequences. Rodgers is down, he has dragged Cobb and Bennett into the abyss with him, oh, and Montgomery is splitting carries with Jones. Coach Stubbs Sr., our thoughts are with you, it was bold, but it may have just backfired.

Bold Predictions

It was another week crammed full of nearly. Not only were there some delectably tight games in the LOC, but I really hit the post on some of these bold predictions. Oh well, you won’t find me crying over spilt milk, I’ll just have to make some more milk! Okay, poor choice of analogy, moving on, quickly.

The Southampton Narwhals vs. ADRZ: The Narwhals best games coincide with big Brady performances, Gronk and Gillislee counteract this by out touchdown-ing #12.

The Dream Team vs. IKSAN: Jordan Reed has not been the player any of us were expecting, can that change this week? I see him tripling Kelce’s score, could be a game changer.

Burdettinators vs. Gridiron Gang: 3 starters from San Fran, has that happened since the glory days of Kaepernick? Wow, that felt weird to type. All three combine for less than 100 yards.

Forge Flyers vs. Bear Necessities: Has there ever been a more critical injury in the LOC? The long answer is that Forge Flyers double Bear Necessities points, the short answer is probably not.

Cash4Gould vs. Tanky McTankface: The past of the New Orleans backfield vs. the future. Kamara becomes the present with a 20 point performance leading Cash4Goud to the win.

Tom’s Tyrants vs. Patistan: Two teams that started the draft receiver heavy go head to head, one is having far more success. Jones and Thomas go big for >35 points.

If this article gets any later, I will have to start a new series. Maybe ‘The twilight zone, featuring the EDOTLOCCA’. Bit of a mouthful actually, better just start writing the article earlier in the day. Peace out.

2017: Power Rankings Week 7

We’re entering the half way point of the regular season and, what’s this? We’re being invaded by cutlery!! They have made base camp in one of the LOC team’s stadiums. The rest of the league are coordinating defences as we speak. Read on to see who is most likely to be conquered by the cutlery next.

Power Rankings

1. Forge Flyers, 4-2 (1): And back to normal service. After Coach Leach succumbed to his first loss of the season, Forge Flyers have promptly righted the ship against a quality side. Even without their star qb they still rolled in a great performance, and with a 2 game lead in the division they may already be too far ahead to catch. 

2. Burdettinators, 2-4 (2): The luck finally fell Coach Burdett’s way! And by that I mean, he didn’t face an opponent on their great week. Burdettinators had their best week of the season in a long overdue, deserved victory. Time will tell if the monkey on their back is gone for good, but there’s no denying how good this team is.

3. The Dream Team, 3-3 (6): Coach Nathwani may as well rename his team ‘The Yo-Yos’ the amount of times I’ve moved them up and down. But this week I like them again despite losing, because they showed to me there is life post OBJ, and they got Peterson which is looking like a smart add to boot. 

4. Patistan, 4-2 (5): The fact that this team is still turning decent day after decent day without their top 2 receivers really doing much of anything so far is impressive in itself. Week in week out they get the points from somewhere, and if those two players turn it on this team will be hard to stop. 

5. Gridiron Gang, 4-2 (8): After a slow start, Gridiron Gang has really turned it around with 4 wins on the bounce, which is even more mind boggling when you remember the sheer number of injuries this team has suffered. If we said they were starting McKinnon, Funchess and Kittle in Week 1 you’d think their season was already over. But alas, they are squarely in the thick of it. 

6. Bear Necessities, 4-2 (3): So we can go ahead and alter that slogan from #PackersOrPanic to just #Panic. But truth be told, I’m loathe to move them down much further (to begin with at least). It was a bad day at the office on Sunday, and while the other packers are now less appealing, this is still a good team that should be good. 

7. ADRZ, 3-3 (4): Remember that uber consistent, decent ADRZ side I was talking about? Yeah you can go ahead and put that out to pasture. I’m not sure what to make of this team now. Their early waiver adds have turned sour, as have many of the options on the team. Will this be a blip, or a trend? We will have to wait and see.

8. IKSAN, 3-3 (7): Speaking of consistency, or the lack thereof, enter IKSAN. This team is all over the place, they can boom or bust, or sit squarely in the middle like they did last week. But looking at the roster they’re lucky last week wasn’t a bust. Especially now without Elliott (for the time being at least), the Winchester division could be about to get even uglier. 

9. Cash4Gould, 4-2 (12): Coach Gardner has taken away my favourite stat that they’ve not topped 90 points this season. For shame. But it was a very good week for them last week, and this team is certainly trending upward. They seem to have figured things out selection wise and players are starting to take form. 

10. Tanky McTankface, 2-4 (11): What’s this? An on paper performance that actually came through for Coach Merritt? Madness! But yes, the team on paper that looked good has finally delivered. The next question - how long will it last? I’d like to say a while, as I do think this is the best Tanky team we’ve seen, so let’s go with that. 

11. Tom’s Tyrants, 1-5 (9): It’s unfortunate Coach Barnes faced TMT last week as they had a good week against the odds, but I do also think this team might also finally be turning the corner. The team still does resemble a house of cards as opposed to bricks, but there’s some glue on there now at least, and they might get some staples soon too. 

12. Southampton Narwhals, 1-5 (10): Meanwhile....the cutlery makes it’s first appearance of the season. It’s early. Perhaps too early. But I think 2017 is already done for Southampton Narwhals. They won last week despite Brady, but without an infusion of waiver wire players I can’t see a scenario where this team comes back from 1-5. Stick a fork in ‘em, THEY DONE.

EDOTLOCCA's Corner: Week 6

Hello one and all, welcome to Week 6! Remember last week when I was saying about how Forge Flyers were undefeated? Yep, cursed them. Remember last week when I was saying about how The Southampton Narwhals were still searching for their first win? Yep, inspired them. So now all we need is a bunch of ties and there will be no zeros in the records at all. Watch this space, but certainly don’t hold your breath. Also, side note, I have just realised that this article is the only thing I use my laptop for, you should all feel very privileged. On with the awards.

Coaches Award

This team is starting to pick up some steam, riding on the back of some electric receivers. He may not have made the perfect choices for starting lineup, but his team is starting to look threatening. This week, he beat the previously unbeatable and that deserves merit in itself. All that despite having a minor debacle at the TE position. Congratulations to Coach Wells, long may t continue for you.

Honourable mention: Coach Allen nearly makes it two weeks on the bounce. He didn’t have a lot to choose from in Week 5, but he got just enough points on the scoreboard. That is his toughest bye week out of the way and he nailed it, great result.

Wooden Spoon

So many points on the bench, so so many points on the bench. From the DEF that he paid a premium for to the young QB setting scoreboards alight to the WR drafted to be a starter, all the cogs were there. It was a cruel 0.68 point loss for Burdettinators and I am convinced Coach Burdett will be kicking himself. Onwards and upwards, he still has a stellar roster.

Bold Predictions

No, stupidly precise, not even close, even further away, kind of along the right lines and finally back to just no. The run was nice why it lasted, almost certainly historic if anyone bothered to keep track of this, but now both my team and predictions are fresh out of form. Time for a heroic turnaround, for both, please?

The Southampton Narwhals vs. Burdettinators: Let’s get this straight, Burdettinator’s RBs will outscore The Narwhals’ RBs. They will also score more TDs between them than the Narwhals’ whole team.

The Dream Team vs. Forge Flyers: More outstanding RB talent on display. All starting RBs go over 100 yards, except of course Ameer Abdullah, because the Lions don’t do that sort of thing.

Gridiron Gang vs. Bear Necessities: Hmm, a selection problem for Coach Stubbs Sr., too many GB RBs. His bench GB RB outscores his starting GB RB and Coach Stubbs Jr. steals a tight Father/Son Bowl.

Cash4Gould vs. Patistan: Both these teams will have their top scoring player in the FLEX position. (Disclaimer: that is currently Bryant and Hogan, if either of those players are moved from the FLEX position, the prediction is treated as correct.)

ADRZ vs. IKSAN: Top two drafted TEs, both may or may not play, those are the kind of headlines that the acronym bowl are made of! I say they both play and they combine for over 30 points.

Tom’s Tyrants vs. Tanky McTankface: This matchup has got WRs written all over it, the yardage totals are close, but only Tanky McTankface gets any receiving TDs, crucial in this 6-pointer (wrong sport).

That’s your lot kind people. I hoped you enjoyed the latest edition of EDOTLOCCA’s Corner and I hope you all win this week, wouldn’t that be nice, if we could all win? Probably wouldn’t do much for the competitive side of the league I suppose, but you take the good with the bad. Until next time.

2017: Power Rankings Week 6

And we're back for another week! Hopefully you're done partying or crying depending on how your week went, and fully focused on Week 6! Stunning to think we are already nearly half way through the regular season, and we're already seeing how divisions are shaping up and who might be too far behind to catch up. Let's roll.

Power Rankings

1. Forge Flyers. 4-1 (1): And with that, there are no longer any undefeated teams remaining this season. The first game we've really seen Coach Leach's side have a hiccup, and they still posted a respectable 85 points, which looks a lot worse than it was as they got less than 3 points from their backup QB. Normal service should resume this week.

2. Burdettinators, 1-4 (2): Now I'm going to break my power ranking rules slightly hear and rate this team on paper, because if we're talking about depth and talent, they should arguably be top of this list. But bad luck continues to haunt them, losing close games to teams who have great weeks. The wins have to come soon (you would think), but right now they've got a monkey on their back.

3. Bear Necessities, 4-1 (5): One would think after losing one of the key proponents of #PackersOrPanic in Montgomery would hurt this team - but in fact getting the back up Jones has not changed a thing - for now. This team will continue to roll on the back of Packers, but when Montgomery comes back, a time share could certainly impact their potential. But for now, I see no reason to hold them back.

4. ADRZ, 3-2 (3): As you were. I could end this analysis here, but I won't. ADRZ have scored between 89-95 points 3 games already, and the two outliers pretty much average out to that. They are uber consistent, and as such that will win the games more often than not. They've been somewhat lucky with their opponents (where have we heard that before), but they are hitting the magic mark each week.

5. Patistan, 4-1 (4): Another team that has just been really consistent so far, picking up a big win last week. While on paper the players they have certainly aren't pretty, inspiring or exotic, they've got some junk yard dogs who are going to fight to put up points each week, and that's really all you can ask for. Look for them to keep on rolling.

6. The Dream Team, 3-2 (6): Some may be befuddled at my decision to keep Coach Nathwani's side at 6 after a 68 point week in an uneven start to the season, but I'll tell you why. Yes, they lost OBJ, but they really only had him for a couple of healthy games anyway and still have 3 wins. They also had 4 players on a bye this week, and key ones at that. Don't expect the OBJ injury to take the wind out of their sales entirely.

7. IKSAN, 2-3 (7): Again, don't read too much into a week where Coach Sherwood lost to the only winless team in the league. They too had some bye week issues, but I am less confident in a rebound from this team than I am in The Dream Team. They have some good players, but there's definitely an air of inconsistency around them, and with the Elliott suspension looming the sky could fall swiftly.

8. Gridiron Gang, 3-2 (8): Another win for Gridiron Gang, and another player lost too injury. How many more injuries will this team get? But somehow, for each injury, they seem to find a viable replacement from the scrap heap each time. They're not posting awesome scores, but they've been relatively consistent of late, and as long as they can maintain that they should pick up some wins.

9. Tom's Tyrants, 1-4 (9): I'm not quite ready to bump this team back down yet....but I'm close. Getting Martin in the lineup will help a lot, and if (when?) Luck returns it should provided another boost - but in the meantime this team will be living off the waiver wire for some positions. Coach Barnes has turned teams around before, let's see if he's got another one in him.

10. Southampton Narhwals, 1-4 (11): Huzzah! Coach Nunn is finally on the board with his first win of the season, and with another decent week it is whole heatedly deserved. And this week, they didn't even need #BradyOrBust to do it, as the points came from other places. They're going to struggle to pile up points, but they've shown a tenacity for getting an ugly 90 points each week. 

11. Tanky McTankface, 1-4 (10): There was a point on Sunday where Coach Merritt said "I don't think this is going to be my year". He might be right. Though, his team did pick it up a bit after he said this. But outside of one week, consistency has really dodged this team so far. Key players just aren't delivering. However, they are getting some players back from a bye, so all is not lost.

12. Cash4Gould, 3-2 (12): Yes they got a win, but it was another eh week for this team, who has still yet to top 90 points. Much like The Tuckfards, key players aren't firing, and up until now they've been leaving points on the bench. That wasn't even the case this week. Is there time to turn it around? Absolutely, they've already got 3 wins in the bag. But as the EDOTLOCCA said, they may have a drawer full of cutlery not before long.

2017: Week 5 Status Report

Gridiron Gang
- Jerick McKinnon: ankle, full practice, will play
- Wendell Smallwood: knee, questionable, unlikely to play

Tom’s Tyrants
- John Brown: quad, questionable, should play

Southampton Narwhals
- Matt Forte: toe, out
- Paul Perkins: ribs, out

IKSAN
- C.J. Prosise: knee, doubtful, unlikely to play

The Dream Team
- Nothing to report

Cash4Gould
- Nothing to report

Buredttinators
- Nothing to report

Patistan
- Nothing to report

Forge Flyers
- Marcus Mariota: hamstring, questionable, probably will not play
- Jeremy Maclin: hand, questionable, should play

ADRZ
- Kenny Golladay: hamstring, out
- Tyrell Williams: neck, questionable, should play

Bear Necessities
- Ty Montgomery: ribs, doubtful, unlikely to play

Tanky McTankface
- Ben Watson: calf, questionable, should play
- Davante Adams: head, questionable, should play

2017: Power Rankings Week 5

Fret not people, they may be one day late but that only makes them sweeter (unless your team has been knocked down a peg for throwing shade that is). The Power Rankings are here to clear up the stir fry that is the LOC. Let's do it.

Power Rankings

1. Forge Flyers, 4-0 (2): The only undefeated team left in the league (and with good reason) Forge Flyers is flying so far this season. Despite losing their QB mid game, they still topped 100 points in a good victory. The roster remains good from top to bottom, and they should be able to get enough points to win more often than not on a weekly basis.

2. Burdettinators, 1-3 (1): As I said on the podcast last week, for some reason, sometimes the good teams just can't bring home the Ws. 3 weeks in a row now they've had more than enough points to arguably win 3 games, yet they sit here at 1-3. They will get the wins, but we've seen before that sometimes the luck just doesn't fall the right way.

3. ADRZ, 2-2 (6): I'm officially awarding this team the status of best auto drafted team ever, let's all give ourselves a round of applause. They're steady and consistent, and that's really all you can ask for in fantasy. They probably experienced a high point last week (helped in no small part to a 23 point effort by their kicker) but they should be a decent side week in week out.

4. Patistan, 3-1, (5): After a lackluster week 3, Coach Allen bounced back with a big win against one of the undefeated teams in the league. Another team that might have inconsistent spots on the roster in a given week, but players will step up around these guys to get them the points they need. This is all without their first 2 picks really starting to fire yet.

5. Bear Necessities, 3-1 (3): As I coined last week, this team's strategy for the season is firmly #PackersOrPanic. This week they panicked, as they lost their first game of the season. Rodgers is a foundation of this side, but the other Packers won't be (especially in the wake of Montgomery's injury). The other options on the team are good not great, and this lead to a loss. But they're still better than most.

6. The Dream Team, 3-1 (4): In a game that no one thought would be as close as it was, Coach Nathwani pulled out the win. Much like Patistan's side, not every player on this team is going to fire every week, but they will get the points from somewhere. The bench is decent, and they should continue to turn in the good performances.

7. IKSAN, 2-2 (7): IKSAN exploded last week after looking like a mixed bag of a team up to this point. This was in no small part due to Cousins finally firing, Miller delivering, Blount getting more than one touch, and Kelce actually being involved in the Chiefs offence. It will be interesting to see if this team will continue to be volatile or stable out a bit. My guess is stable (barring an Elliot suspension).

8. Gridiron Gang, 2-2 (11): After a shaky start, Coach Stubbs Jr. has steadied the ship to bring the team back to 2-2. They were boosted by a big performance by Bell last week, but Carson was also injured which held the team back. It will be interesting to see how this team copes, losing their 5th player of the season to IR. Incredibly they keep finding credible options on the waiver wire to fill the gap, but how long can that continue?

9. Tom's Tyrants, 1-3 (8): Another disappointing week for Tom's Tyrants who have now dropped their 3rd game in a row also. Outside of Bilal Powell (of all people), there wasn't much to scream and shout about on this team last week. But I'm going to chalk this one up to a bad week, and they should be better than this going forward (unless they stick with Cutler of course).

10. Tanky McTankface, 1-3 (9): The upside on Tanky McTankface really left the building quickly. It has been a curious start to the year for Coach Merritt. On paper this team looks pretty good, really good even. But a combination of disappointing performances and options on the bench making him look like a mug have lead to a ho hum start to the year. Let's see if the old dog can flip the switch.

11. Southampton Narwhals, 0-4 (12): For 3 weeks in a row now Southampton Narwhals have been contesting in games they really had no business making close. But that's how it goes sometimes in fantasy, and when you enact the #BradyOrBust protocol that's what happens. A phenomenal effort from the special teams masked a disappointing week last week, but with a few waiver additions maybe they can improve.

12. Cash4Gould, 2-2 (10): And now people, after an undefeated start, I think we've seen Coach Gardner's true colours come to the fore. Losing Cook mid game stung, but this wasn't the reason they lost, it was just a disappointing effort, in which their bench nearly beat their actual score. But that's a good thing, as it means they have options. They just need to get better at playing the right ones each week.

EDOTLOCCA's Corner: Week 5

Good evening everyone! Thank you for, once again, tuning in to your weekly dose of EDOTLOCCA’s Corner. I probably don’t say thank you enough for you guys actually reading this, especially with it being such rambling nonsense, so yeah, give yourselves a pat on the back from me. Anyway, football. The season is starting to shape up and it looks like another tight one. Only Forge Flyers remain undefeated and somewhat unfortunately, The Southampton Narwhals are still searching for their first win. In other words, all to play for!

Coaches Award

There isn’t always a clear cut choice for the Coaches Award. I try to pick out individual moments of genius, e.g. a waiver wire add or starting a bench player that earned you the win, rather than just a high scorer who hasn’t changed their line-up for 6 weeks. And yes, I probably miss a few of these intricate movements, but equally, sometimes the week just runs smoothly without anything too drastic being required. Anyway, I went on for a bit longer than intended and you probably already knew it all… and it was an irrelevant to the award this week. Congratulations to Coach Allen, he has played QB roulette like a pro and it was critical he got the right player in for the W this week.

Wooden Spoon

Should have saved that long explanation about the Coaches Award for this blurb, because it would be far more relevant. Well, basically as above but vice versa, looking for someone who made the wrong decision and it cost them the game. You may have put two and two together here, but a ton of bench points in a losing week are gonna get you listed here a lot. If Coach Gardner doesn’t start finding the right combination of players to get on the pitch, he will have a very full cutlery draw come December.

Bold Predictions

And we are four and four! Well, 4-20 for the season, but one a week is plenty to keep this EDOTLOCCA beaming. This time IKSAN are the receptors of my gratitude, after they absolutely torched Tanky McTankface.

The Southampton Narwhals vs. IKSAN: Could a couple of bye weeks help The Narwhals to win one? When Hilton, Landry, Graham and Jones all go over 100 yards, things start looking good.

The Dream Team vs. Cash4Gould: Battle of the Bears RBs! I know right, who would have thought the Bears would have two fantasy relevant players! Howard: 60 yards and 1 TD, Cohen 20 rushing yards and 100 receiving yards, tie.

Burdettinators vs. Patistan: Great week to play Patistan, without their top two draft picks. But with serviceable backups on decent matchups, I still think 600 total receiving yards is on the cards.

Forge Flyers vs. ADRZ: Who saw 23 points from a K coming? C’mon, hands up. Yeah, no one. It wouldn’t be bold to predict that both Ks combine for less than this, it would be expected. Let’s go for two Ks, over 30 points.

Bear Necesstities vs. Tanky McTankface: Wouldn’t it be just typical for Davante Adams to go nuts for Coach Merritt? Neutralising the core of Bear Necessities team by catching all of Green Bay’s TDs.

Tom’s Tyrants vs. Gridiron Gang: This matchup just looks like it will come down to which of The Steelers’ Killer B’s owns the matchup, Bell or Brown. One scores over 25 and leads their team to victory, the other scores under 10.

And there we have it, another week in the books and another batch of Bold Predictions. Good luck to everyone this week and remember, it isn’t about winning, it is about making my predictions come true. G’night!