Greetings kind folk, I hope you come prepared to divulge in
the latest entry into the LOC history books. As always, the most meaningless
chapters in said history books come straight from the darkest corners, the
EDOTLOCCA’s corners that is. If that little intro hasn’t reminded you why you
never click on the link that I post each week, then nothing will, so we might
as well get into the nitty gritty.
Coaches Award
When only one game amongst the whole week of matchups really
stands out as a high scorer, it is hard not to look in that direction for such
an award. I have already questioned (multiple times) the brave tactic of
committing oneself so closely to the fate of one particular team, but the
questions will dry up with more performances like these. Congrats to Coach
Stubbs Sr. for proving that his pioneering fantasy tactic does make the grade.
And what a happy coincidence that Coach Stubbs Sr. is such a big fan of Green
Bay too… oh… wait a minute…
Honourable Mention: Proving once again that necessity is the
mother of invention, Tanky McTankface refuse to do what you expect of them.
Great performance and well deserved win, can this team go further though?
Wooden Spoon
Ouch, sometimes there doesn’t really seem to be a reason for
a team doing particularly badly, the players just don’t seem to be living up to
expectation. Well, Gridiron Gang need to take a good hard look at themselves
because something doesn’t add up here. For all the wheeling and dealing that
Coach Stubbs Jr. has managed in the early part of the season, he needs to find
away to put some points on the board. Cutting loose with Palmer was a good
start, lets see if he can keep it trending up.
Bold Predictions
I can honestly say that I have never felt hard done by
whilst writing this before. I got one whole prediction right! Cash4Gould’s
rookies did make Zeke look useless, but I hit the post on two more and was so
close to a .500 record for the week, the stuff dreams are made of. It will
come, we just have to keep pushing on!
Forge Flyers vs. The Southampton Narwhals: The Narwhals look
in trouble early doors, a culmination of bad depth and really bad luck. From
their point of view, Forge Flyers must look like the metaphorical Goliath,
Brady could just be their David however, cracking the 40 point mark.
Burdettinators vs. The Dream Team: If there is one constant
that you can count on in fantasy football, it is that you start whoever is
playing the Saints. Newton and Benjamin combine for 50 points here and all
Coach Nathwani can do is watch.
Patistan vs. Gridiron Gang: Coach Stubbs Jr. really needs
someone (anyone) to step up at this point, but Patistan’s WRs may be too hot to
handle this week. Overdue some breakout games, the three receivers go over the
50 mark.
Bear Necessities vs. Cash4Gould: To continue his perfect
record, Coach Gardner might need to start scoring a few more points. He
continues his winning record here, but it is close again, with the highest
scoring game of the week totalling 240+ points.
Tanky McTankface vs. ADRZ: In a matchup of arguably the two
least predictable coaches in LOC history, predicting anything at all seems bold to be
honest. So lets go with this: *spins giant wheel that you can’t see but totally
exists* TEs! *spins wheel once more* 35 points! There you go, TEs combine for
at least 35 points, your guess is as good as mine.
Tom’s Tyrants vs. IKSAN: Will Zeke show up this week? If he
doesn’t then this could well be the most uninspired group of RBs every
collected in a LOC matchup. Well, I am going bold here and saying that there is
only one rushing TD in this Week 3 game, and it goes to Trevor Siemian,
obviously.
Despite feeling cheated from last week, I am still on a hat
trick ball here, so I want everyone to keep their fingers crossed for another
successful week. Disregard your meaningless fantasy sports to assist in my
pursuit of correct meaningless predictions about your meaningless fantasy
sports! Don’t ask why, just do it! Until next time.
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