EDOTLOCCA's Corner: Week 1

Welcome, welcome good people of the LOC! Here we find ourselves, staring week 1 in the face, fresh off of yet another memorable draft experience. But, now that the offseason hangovers have cleared, it is time to get serious. EDOTLOCCA’s Corner is here to guide you through (probably most of) the 2017 season; celebrating greatness, rubbing salt in wounds and, most importantly, going bold. Strap yourselves in people, not only will it be one heck of a ride, but it will most certainly be bumpy. The season starts now!

Coaches Award

Before I get too far, I would like to remind everyone that I won my forfeit game last year and am under no obligation to unnecessarily hype up any team (although I would like to remind anyone who may have lost said forfeit game that the Tyrants are in need of some love right now). Regardless of any deals that were made, if a coach has a stellar draft, they deserve recognition. After a few years in the dark, Coach Leach has given the fans something to cheer for again. With a good mix of high upside and high floor players, a slew of respectable backups and a fan favourite in Mariota leading the way, Forge Flyers have had a great start to the season! Commendation is well deserved for Coach Leach.

Honourable Mention: We all know that going bold will get you respect in EDOTLOCCA’s Corner, well two separate teams drafted themselves 3 rookie RBs each this year, that is bold! That has got ambition written all over it! But, only one of those coaches brought party poppers to the draft… If you are going to mix boldness with flair, you have definitely bagged yourself an honourable mention, plus he has drafted a pretty nifty team as well! Congrats, Coach Allen.

Wooden Spoon

You know it, I know it, I am pretty sure that even Coach Merritt knows it, a true cardinal sin of draft day is selecting a player who has already been confirmed as out for the season. So soon after earning the right to be known as IKSAN instead of IKNAN, Coach Sherwood has taken his eyes off the ball for this one. I’m not sure if I could handle typing out ITOIRDKNAN each time, so he had better pull his socks up and stay focused for the regular season! (That’s; It Turned Out I Really Did Know Nothing About NFL by the way, but I’m sure you’d gotten that).

Bold Predictions

Southampton Narwhals vs. Bear Necessities: In a real game of double or quits, Coach Nunn will be hoping his Seattle DEF can hold off half the Green Bay offence. With two turnovers and a TD, Southampton Narwhals get the ‘W’ and Coach Stubbs Sr.’s bold draft day strategy looks miserable in Week 1.

Burdettinators vs. Tanky McTankface: Instant revenge game to start the season! With Coach Burdett’s long standing tradition of only beating Coach Merritt when it matters (and most recently stealing his very identity within the league), plus some tough match ups for Burdettinators, Tanky McTankface record the biggest Week 1 victory, 35 clear points.

Forge Flyers vs. Gridiron Gang: Sometimes you just have to sit back and admire a matchup, two well drafted and well balanced teams fighting for bragging rights in the LOC report. Forge Flyers RBs go over 50 points, so do Gridiron Gang’s WRs and everyone just has an all-round nice time.

Cash4Gould vs. ADRZ: The sophomore that was being written off before the draft vs. the auto draftee, doesn’t exactly scream headline matchup does it? However, after two very solid drafts, opinions of these teams may (and should) be changing. The difference here will be that one first round pick is playing, and one is hunkering down in a hurricane, ADRZ win by AJ Green’s statline.

Patistan vs. IKSAN: Speaking of first round picks playing, make the most of seeing Elliott on the field. Coach Allen can certainly feel hard done by, being on the other end of a game-changing 25 point performance before Zeke fades into fantasy irrelevance for half a season.

The Dream Team vs. Tom’s Tyrants: Possibly the most and least balanced teams facing off in Week 1, Coach Nathwani reminds Coach Barnes why RBs matter too. However, this game comes down to Monday night in Minnesota. If the Saints win, so do The Dream Team, but if the Vikings win, then so do the Tyrants.

There you have it people, your first EDOTLOCCA’s Corner of the season and, as a treat, I have a bonus Bold Prediction for you: this will be a weekly article, without fail, for the whole of 2017. Anyone who has paid any attention for the last couple of years will understand just how bold that is. Anyway, seeing as I am pretty sure no one ever bothers with the outro, I will call it here. Good luck for the season everyone, and particularly for Week 1!